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Lance to head up WADA


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#1 Ali

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Posted 25 April 2010 - 01:27 PM

Here's how to clean up doping in cycling. I'm surprised nobody thought of this before me ...

Put Lance in charge. That'll scare the sh.t out of any potential dopers. The thought of that haunting stare appearing unannounced at their doorstep will surely push all athletes to seek out a blameless existance based on organic vegetables, berries and small insects.

I guess our neolithic predecessors had it nailed from the start. It took someone like Lance to remind us all of the values which the human race should live by. Winning the TdF 7 times was obviously just a warm up for his subsequent substantial contribution to society.

Yep, if I thought Lance was in charge of detecting and punishing dopers, I may even give up drinking unsure.gif ?!

#2 fab

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Posted 26 April 2010 - 04:28 AM

Sure the best doper knows all the tricks to dope!

With Dr Ferrari as technical advisor they would be very efficient. No 20mn to take a shower or to have a drink would be allowed before testing.
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#3 Ali

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Posted 28 April 2010 - 12:52 PM

QUOTE(fab @ Apr 26 2010, 12:28 PM) View Post

Sure the best doper knows all the tricks to dope!

With Dr Ferrari as technical advisor they would be very efficient. No 20mn to take a shower or to have a drink would be allowed before testing.

Any theories on how Lance manages to avoid all doping traps ?

I mean really ... how does that work ? They're testing the feck out of his bodily fluids and meanwhile he's swanning around enjoying the high life. If it's not bonking super models, it's cruising the high seas on millionaires super-yachts ?

Come on ! Survives terminal cancer ? ... Wins the TdF seven times in a row ? ... Stealth technology for all known dope tests ?

Anyone ever consider whether the Second Coming kind of already happened and he's just taking time out to enjoy the high-life before he has to get down to business ?

Maybe He's just taking the piss out of all those types who betrayed Him the first time around ?

Any more rational explanations would be welcome ...

#4 VdB

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Posted 29 April 2010 - 07:04 AM

QUOTE(Ali @ Apr 28 2010, 10:52 PM) View Post

Survives terminal cancer ?


Isn't that an oxymoron? blink.gif Well, maybe not if he is divine in nature. Somehow I wouldn't expect JC 2.0 to talk the kind of smack Armstrong does, though. laugh.gif
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#5 buddy

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Posted 29 April 2010 - 06:04 PM

Now think about it ..... if you were truly the son of god then you may also have a little ego problem that leads one to talk the way he does.

Lets face it .... whatcha gonna do .... go and have it out with the dad.

Glad to see Ali has now annoited LA as the second coming ... and I don't think rational explaination and Ali can be rightfully used in the same sentence.

#6 Ali

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Posted 08 May 2010 - 12:23 PM

QUOTE(buddy @ Apr 30 2010, 03:04 AM) View Post

Now think about it ..... if you were truly the son of god then you may also have a little ego problem that leads one to talk the way he does.

Lets face it .... whatcha gonna do .... go and have it out with the dad.

Glad to see Ali has now annoited LA as the second coming ... and I don't think rational explaination and Ali can be rightfully used in the same sentence.

Given that everyone on this forum is adamant that He doped the hardest, what else am I to think ? How else can the crack anti-doping bods of this world have a complete blind spot for Him ?

If it transpires that he is not Him, he is still a remarkable individual with special, as yet undefined, physical or mental mutant powers. Perhaps he should be known as Lance X-Strong ?

I look forward to him kicking ass at the TdCal next week, BTW wink.gif

#7 Velo

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Posted 23 May 2010 - 03:56 PM

QUOTE(Ali @ Apr 25 2010, 05:27 PM) View Post

I'm surprised nobody thought of this before me ...
I'm really not all that surprised.


#8 Pelotonium

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Posted 23 May 2010 - 04:29 PM

QUOTE(Ali @ Apr 28 2010, 04:52 PM) View Post

Any theories on how Lance manages to avoid all doping traps ?
Any more rational explanations would be welcome ...


Ali, just give it up, will ya.

Your shtick isn't funny anymore. You can use all the smoke in the world, but your show is coming to an abrupt end very soon.

The moment of truth has arrived and that means that you, my dear Ali, have become obsolete. None of your jester monologues will work, now. You and your ilk have been outted.

So don't let the door hit you on the way out. :-)



#9 Dedman

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Posted 25 May 2010 - 05:33 AM

As tounge in cheek as Ali's post was he asks an interesting question. If LA is as guilty of doping as most here think he is, how has he gotten away with it?

#10 smug

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Posted 25 May 2010 - 05:48 AM

QUOTE(Dedman @ May 25 2010, 09:33 AM) View Post

As tounge in cheek as Ali's post was he asks an interesting question. If LA is as guilty of doping as most here think he is, how has he gotten away with it?

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#11 Velo

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Posted 25 May 2010 - 07:08 AM

QUOTE(Dedman @ May 25 2010, 09:33 AM) View Post
As tounge in cheek as Ali's post was he asks an interesting question. If LA is as guilty of doping as most here think he is, how has he gotten away with it?
Same way Landis got away with EPO, blood doping, HGH, testosterone, etc from 2002-2006. Same way Millar got away with it before he was fingered by Gaumont and arrested. Same way almost all of Festina got away with it before Voet's car was stopped at the border. Same way Saiz got away with running a team doping program for a decade or more at ONCE and LS. Same way Ullrich got away with it for years, despite being one of the top GT riders and winning the Tour and being tested numerous times. Ditto Basso. Same way Riis and all of T-Mob got away with it for almost 15 years, until d'Hont came along.

Like to point out that other than Landis, not one of those named riders and only a handful of Festina, ONCE/LS, or T-Mob riders ever tested positive.

But in the end, it almost always comes out. First it was ONCE/Liberty Seguros' (ie Saiz) turn thanks to the Fuentes raid, couple of years ago it was T-Mob's turn thanks to whistleblower d'Hont, now it appears that it might be USPS/Bruyneel's turn thanks to whistleblower Landis.


#12 Pelotonium

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Posted 25 May 2010 - 07:11 AM

QUOTE(Dedman @ May 25 2010, 09:33 AM) View Post

As tounge in cheek as Ali's post was he asks an interesting question. If LA is as guilty of doping as most here think he is, how has he gotten away with it?



What, the most tested athlete in sports history? :-)


Dedman, what's so interesting about bribery, fraud, and deception anymore? It's such a simple concept, and so over-used...

Edited by Pelotonium, 25 May 2010 - 07:12 AM.


#13 Dedman

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Posted 25 May 2010 - 08:42 AM

QUOTE(Velo @ May 25 2010, 03:08 PM) View Post

Same way Landis ... Same way Millar ... Same way Saiz ... Same way Ullrich ... Ditto Basso. Same way Riis ...


That's all well and good but what way is that?

#14 Velo

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Posted 25 May 2010 - 11:24 AM

QUOTE(Dedman @ May 25 2010, 12:42 PM) View Post


That's all well and good but what way is that?
Multiple ways. Frei, for instance, says that he just drank a lot of water whenever he microdosed EPO:

http://www.velonatio...-detection.aspx


#15 OAR

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Posted 25 May 2010 - 06:09 PM

QUOTE(Dedman @ May 25 2010, 11:42 AM) View Post

That's all well and good but what way is that?

Those guys have or had it down to a science. They knew when, where, how much, more time, etc. They made the doping to best the test! Simple ####. Not like a whiskey mist altitude tent on the top of a sky scraper..like that dude on CN said! laugh.gif
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#16 buddy

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Posted 26 May 2010 - 12:21 AM

With many a good doctor specializing in "how to beat the tests" it is/was obviously not hard to beat the system.

If anyone here really knew those answers they would be getting paid lots of money by cheating athletes and wouldn't tell us anyway.

I think basically though most of the tests rely on a certain threshold that needs to be reached before it is considered positive. This threshold is usually way above what a normal person would have to eliminate the "false positive" problem.

All the good docs do is advise the athletes how to stay under those thresholds and then a positive is not flagged even though the amount of "whatever" may substantially exceed what a normal person would have.

I hope that the bio passport has made this harder to achieve in relation to the blood manipulation problems. The other drugs ..... I think the thresholds still apply.

Please anyone with a better knowledge correct me if I am wrong but that is my simplistic understanding.

Thanks,

Buddy

#17 Ali

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Posted 27 May 2010 - 10:26 AM

QUOTE(Velo @ May 25 2010, 04:08 PM) View Post

Same way Landis got away with EPO, blood doping, HGH, testosterone, etc from 2002-2006. Same way Millar got away with it before he was fingered by Gaumont and arrested. Same way almost all of Festina got away with it before Voet's car was stopped at the border. Same way Saiz got away with running a team doping program for a decade or more at ONCE and LS. Same way Ullrich got away with it for years, despite being one of the top GT riders and winning the Tour and being tested numerous times. Ditto Basso. Same way Riis and all of T-Mob got away with it for almost 15 years, until d'Hont came along ...

One would have to conclude from that history that testing is a waste of time and money. Even when they get it right (Landis), they get it wrong (Landis). Maybe looking into their eyes is the most reliable method after all ... maybe that's why it was proposed ? Awareness of what was flying beneath the radar.

#18 adker

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Posted 30 July 2010 - 11:24 AM

QUOTE(Ali @ May 27 2010, 02:26 PM) View Post

One would have to conclude from that history that testing is a waste of time and money. Even when they get it right (Landis), they get it wrong (Landis). Maybe looking into their eyes is the most reliable method after all ... maybe that's why it was proposed ? Awareness of what was flying beneath the radar.


I posted some time ago (tounge and cheek but maybe not)

I predicted that lance would have a ho hum tour, and just focus on not getting caught doing anything illegal. He would then retire and say he just competed at 39 clean and could still hang with all the dopers. Then under the weight of the investigation come clean on his past, explain that the UCI was complicit in his doping during his peak and they allowed everyone to do so. He was the best in a fully doped peleton. Provide evidence that the UCI was completely corrupt and in the process crush that organization as the governing body. Then partner with the ASO to take over the leadership of the sport of which as the hero of new day of cycling assume the leadership of the sport and be in charge of controlling it's future including oversight of doping control.

Maybe I am not so far off....of course he has to get past the hurtle of his SCA testimony but perhaps the statute has run out on that.

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#19 OAR

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Posted 08 September 2010 - 09:55 AM

QUOTE(adker @ Jul 30 2010, 02:24 PM) View Post

I posted some time ago (tounge and cheek but maybe not)

I predicted that lance would have a ho hum tour, and just focus on not getting caught doing anything illegal. He would then retire and say he just competed at 39 clean and could still hang with all the dopers. Then under the weight of the investigation come clean on his past, explain that the UCI was complicit in his doping during his peak and they allowed everyone to do so. He was the best in a fully doped peleton. Provide evidence that the UCI was completely corrupt and in the process crush that organization as the governing body. Then partner with the ASO to take over the leadership of the sport of which as the hero of new day of cycling assume the leadership of the sport and be in charge of controlling it's future including oversight of doping control.

Maybe I am not so far off....of course he has to get past the hurtle of his SCA testimony but perhaps the statute has run out on that.

That was more or less the situation. LA just went through the motions, I mean crashes.

Funny now but I wish Ali would have titled the thread “Lance to head up UCI”.

One man with his whisky mist altitude tent is singlehandedly about to bring down all of USAcycling. Who would have ever thought it would be possible.

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